Co-Creating Is A Whole New Kind of Collaboration
The Collaboration Norm: Since my introduction to nonprofit organizations in the 1960’s, an expectation is partnering and collaborating. The reasons always are to leverage resources, avoid duplication and be cost-effective. When my mom developed the first meals-on-wheels program for homebound seniors in Pittsburgh in the 1970’s, it was a collaborative effort between B’nai Brith Women, The Jewish Home for the Aged and Jewish Family and Children Services. When I helped design the first transitional living program for teens aging out of foster care in Miami in the 1990’s, it was a collaborative effort of Switchboard of Miami – a suicide prevention hotline – and Miami Bridge – an emergency shelter for runaway and homeless youth. In 2011, the Managance team facilitated a public policy change initiative with a coalition of seven organizations responsible for the education and credentialing of midwives. The impactful effort aligned with a networked collaboration model where the collective social impact of midwifery instead of each organization was the focus, [“The Networked Nonprofit” Jane Wei-Skillern and Sonia Marciano. Stanford Social Innovation Review Spring 2008. www.ssir.org]
In 2016, when I read about “co-creating” in Judith E. Glaser’s book Conversational Intelligence, How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results, I experienced another professional transformation. “Co-creating” takes partnering and collaborating to yet another dimension. “Co-creating,” according to Judith, is sharing and discovering together new ideas in a space where it is safe to explore real concerns and aspirations. It requires transparency and a more in-depth relationship-building with the person or people with whom you are working. It takes partnering and collaboration to a higher level as it sparks oxytocin, a neurotransmitter that stimulates bonding and positive feelings. It enables us to work through challenges and build the trust that makes engaging and finding shared solutions possible.
It is a myth that work is more manageable with sharing responsibilities through partnering and collaborating. It isn’t, and it takes more time than you think. It makes the work experience more interesting, it makes outcomes and results better, and that makes the investment worth it. And when you take it up a notch, to “co-creating,” you get results that people share and are more excited and energized to be a part of, and that makes it even more worthwhile.
Co-Creating is A Whole New Kind of Collaboration: Humans are hardwired to resist sharing fears. We worry that if we share them, we embarrass ourselves and others will laugh and reject us. We worry that we won’t be right, and if we are wrong, others do not see us as successful. And we worry that we won’t compare well to others’ expectations. Co-creating shifts that. It requires leaders to be comfortable putting fears and desires out for consideration; to be able to be courageously vulnerable. And when you are and include time to reflect on what occurred, you experience a new appreciation for the heightened capacity that results from partnering.
Co-Creating Examples: A nonprofit coalition leader finds herself arguing with a colleague where they didn’t conflict in the past. The barbs feel like personal insults and their ability to continue the excellent work they have done together feels as if it is slipping away. She learns to listen without judgment to her colleague’s concerns, asks more discovery questions, and she doesn’t immediately react as if her colleague is angry with her. Instead, she focuses on the process they use to work together. She thanks him for sharing what’s on his mind and suggests they come back to it another time. In the break, he reconnects to his past success, and new ideas start percolating. They are calm when they reconvene. He shares some new thoughts, and she adds her perspective. While there are some downs and more often ups in their conversations, they keep practicing. The experience paves the way for significant new funding to expand the coalition’s work and a staff retreat agenda that comfortably reflects fresh ideas to build more trust and co-creating opportunities across the organization.
Two consultants meet during an online course and learn that they are neighbors. Over dinner, they feel a connection and synergy of ideas worth exploring further. One of them has a workshop opportunity and invites the other one to collaborate. They both come at the partnering from their experience of success. While positive feedback from the workshop suggests it is a good partnership, the experience of partnering is stressful. With their success, they feel comfortable honestly sharing what it felt like to do this work together. They discover they both made assumptions about who would do what to prepare, and one person took control while the other person didn’t quite know how to be supportive. They have another workshop opportunity. This time there are more questions, more give and take, more honest sharing of information, more laughing and more ideas that make working together more fulfilling and worth the investment.
Start Sharpening Your Co-Creating Skills: The leaders in these examples used various conversational practices that calm the amygdala. Also referred to as the primitive brain, the amygdala decides how we react to a perceived or actual threat (‘flight, fight, freeze and appease’) and protects us from harm. [Wisdom of the 5 Brains. Conversational Intelligence® for Coaches. ©Benchmark Communications, Inc. and The CreatingWe® Institute.] According to Judith, with a calm amygdala, we access other parts of our brain where our memories, knowledge, and ideas reside. And that’s when we access our capacity to co-create, which in today’s VUCA world, is a critical skill. To build your co-creating skills, Judith recommends these strategies: Before you launch a conversation, talk to agree about what you want to accomplish in the discussion. Bring your focus to what the other person or people are saying and not what you are thinking. In using Judith’s important conversational practice of “listening to connect,” responses grow from the dialogue instead of your thoughts. Keep expanding sharing of information. Use phrases and questions such as, “say more about that” or “what else is on your mind” or “what makes that important to you.” Use the new information you learn to shape what comes next in the conversation. Practice noticing with colleagues what’s working to cement in the experience of making “co-creating” a new habit.
Managance Consulting & Coaching is on a mission to ignite passion and energize opportunity in nonprofit workplaces. Denice Hinden, Ph.D., PCC, President, and her team inspire leaders and teams to their next level of leadership and develop more trusting “we-centered” organizational cultures with transformational leadership development and engaging strategic thinking. Denice is Certified in Conversational Intelligence®. Judith E. Glaser is the founder and CEO of Benchmark Communications, Inc., and the Chairman of The Creating We Institute. We are honored to partner with Judith to bring you our 2017-2018 Leveling Up Leadership Blog.
Copyright © 2018 by Managance Consulting & Coaching and Judith E. Glaser